comfort zone

The inability to let go of that sense of security. ... i just cant do it. Had a conversation with my girlfriend about throwing the towel and walk away from this organisation...she has had it!..and I thought : can I do that?... just drop everything and do what I want to do as and when I like to do it?

I started giving myself excuses like : too much obligation la : don't know what to do la : what if the grass is not GREENER on the other side la.

What has ever become of my blind faith in life? I use to just pull myself out of any company and go and start again. but now i have this mental condition resulting in this mental boundaries that may have given me an artificial sense of security..Why?

Could it be my age? or have i really found my calling? same job till i retire? have i lost that ability to live my life to the fullest?

have a girlfriend who wants to quit her present job and try out something new..no doubt its harder than what she is doing now and way way tougher to survive and with possibly less pay, less glamorous, more headache and even less time to spend with her family. and yet she wants to do it! though its suicidal i admire that. i cant do it...

i learned a new phrase today- cognitive dissonance - the state of unease or discomfort an individual experiences when actual reality doesn't correspond to the constructed mental image. (I personally feel that the fanatical fans of Mawi are suffering from this! )

Anyway, Mawi aside, its like you create this believe in your mind that you think it represent the actual scenario but in fact it is distorted and untrue from what that things really is. i feel that way about my love life.. in fact about the whole marriage institution!

So am I going to do it? jeng jeng jeng....